Monday, February 25, 2019


I don't know why I need to pen this down now but here I am. One time, when I was changing to an L train, we (as in all the commuters from the train I was on who were also transferring to the L) were rushing down a stairway, 'cos we'd seen the sign on the platform upstairs that said the L was there and leaving. There was a couple who were in front of me, taking a leisurely stroll and chatting with each other happily, and I was behind them, and there was a man behind me frustrated that the couple were technically blocking the way and taking their time. He snapped "can y'all move along, the train is here and it's leaving!" but given that it was an interchange, it was noisy and I don't think they even heard him. I felt the same sentiments as the man, but as a Singaporean sheep, I don't express when I am upset, I keep it in and whine when I am home. When we had all got into the L and were seated, for whatever reason in the world, it was just waiting there and didn't move off anyway. I sat in my seat and I thought, how strange it was that we were all taking the same train, and the couple were in a good disposition despite not rushing for it, the man was irritated and had hurried in vain since the train was not moving off, and I was silent throughout, observing the futility of getting yourself all flustered. This all took place within three minutes at the maximum, but it's been on my mind for weeks.


I just rewatched Scott Pilgrim and now my head is full of those sound effect words, like "kapow" and that kinda thing. Also, I am sorely tempted to cut my hair and dye it a Manic Panic color, like all pink, then blue, then green. But I'm 29 this year, and I really don't wanna be that girl who still lives like she's a movie character. Like Ramona and Scott, I have seen signs of exes reappearing in my life. For example, remember Jon who had another girl at the airport when I was in a cab with him from his apartment? Yeah he started following me on Instagram. I am not interested at all in dating him again. In fact, I am not interested in any man I've dated in Singapore, so I'm not gonna be dating for half a year, which will be the longest it's been since 2014? It feels good though, my mental health/mood-tracking app has been stable and on the positive side and it's nice to know that my non-dating streak will be working in tandem with that. My deadline for writing is Feb 28, which gives me three days. 28 is my favorite number but deadlines? Not my favorite thing in the world.