Saturday, August 31, 2019

FOSTER THE PEOPLE

I went to my friend's 21st birthday party last night. After we'd eaten, we played Mario Kart on Wii, a round of foosball, and a round of life-size jenga. Sometime during the party, Lucas said he was bored and if we went to parties that his friends threw, they would have better music and better aesthetic. My period is due tomorrow, according to the app, so I might be extra touchy, but that struck my nerve. The music being played was the type of music I listen to, and the aesthetic was exactly the aesthetic I had for my 28th birthday last year, and I showed Lucas a photo of it. He tried to backpedal, but I was pissed off. Lucas says he doesn't think I'm basic, and he doesn't like "basic" people, but I'm the poster girl of basic, and I'm not ashamed of it. I unabashedly love Taylor Swift and pop music. I love the look of mass-produced fashion, or at least I don't dress "alternative". I love what I love, and I don't like people who shame other people for being proud of what they love (unless it's, you know, guns or whatever). Lucas said he didn't mean that he thinks he and his group of friends are cooler than myself and my friends, but he used the words "better music" and "better aesthetic" and that's close enough. Secondly, whatever the aesthetic and music being played, he was there with me, and being bored while I'm right there next to him, also annoys me. Having conversation with a loved one should not depend on where you are and what you're doing.

Anyway, I went for therapy this week and I told Lyssa about it. I said it sort of reminded me of this Hindi movie we'd both seen together, where Shah Rukh Khan acts as Alia Bhatt's therapist, and she falls for him, romantically. I think if you have a good therapist, you are likely to find yourself being extremely fond of them. I like my therapist a lot, I don't know why, is it because they let me say my darkest thoughts for an hour (because they're being paid to) or because I feel safe with them. Who knows??? I think health insurance should cover seeing a therapist, but I highly doubt that will ever be the case in Singapore.