Sunday, July 12, 2020

SPICE GIRLS

In the past year, I've distanced myself from people who used to be my best friends or close friends. These were for a variety of reasons. They did not acknowledge toxic masculinity as being insidiously present in our racial and religious community. We don't see eye to eye in politics and they don't support minimum wage. They didn't really see systemic racism in Singapore. They're not feminist. They're not vocal enough. They don't believe in therapy. This applies to a range of people I used to meet very often, and describes perhaps up to ten people I was or still am friends with. I have equally high standards for the relationships I'm in. My partner is in a company that doesn't support black lives? I will raise the issue. He reads Marxist books written by old white men but not brown women from Southeast Asia? Also called into question. You're a Democrat but you voted for Clinton instead of Sanders? That means you still don't empathize with class issues and you're dropped. Anyway, all this to say, as long as you don't value the life of a marginalized person (black / woman / LGBT / minority / poor / disabled / immigrant, etc) as much as you do your own life, and if you don't use your voice and platform and privilege to amplify theirs, I don't think you're entitled to my time. In this aspect, I think I've made my boundaries very clear. 

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